Hello World 2015

I am “back” and I am quite shock to see my last post was dated 31st Dec 2013. One and a half year passed so quickly just like that. *snap snap*

Now a mother of two *gasp*. Was looking through my previous entries i was still cooing over my little pre-toddler. Z will be turning 3 this Aug and my little girl is currently 4 months. I am grateful for my children existence. They brought me joy and through these 2 lives – I’ve learned (still learning) to trust God even more.

Why did i resume blogging? I miss “documenting” my life down. I prefer writing in journal to be honest but to be SUPER honest – my handwriting is horrendous. I think I shall save paper, ink and my children eyesight (Yes both of YOU ZEB & ABI). Mommy wrote the blog is to give you a glimpse what’s life for me (+ daddy) while having the both of you. I don’t know when you will be reading this (probably in your 20s?) but for surely i know when you read this – you probably be laughing and crying. Z yes you – you’ve yet to sttn (Sleep Through The Night in case you need to Google (do you google now or is it another new term?)) and i am getting dark circles all thanks to you. Ms Abi – sweet little girl. *kiss*

I am back blogging 🙂

Looking Back 2013 – Counting blessings

“An unreflected experience is a lost experience”

2013 had been quite an eventful year for me.  Actually every year had always been eventful. Perhaps extra more this year especially I have Z now. Many people started posting on their FB, Twitter about their blessings in their lives despite the ups and downs. Is great to see people counting their blessings and it just send so much positive vibes around to do likewise and that includes me! So here goes…

A blessing to just spend time with my love ones enjoying fellowship, seabreeze and breakfast! (hur hur! As if such sight (referring a seaview breakfast) happens every weekend! Ha!)

A blessing to deliberately taking time off to reflect what my God had done for me. To admire my God’s creative works. To simply just dwell in His Presence.

A blessing to share home cook meals for my family love ones and my friends who want something yummy to warm their tummy and soul.

A blessing filled with so much fun and laughter *kinder surprise!* whenever I meet up with my secondary school buddies for more than 10 years.

Photo 31-12-13 10 52 12 pmPhoto 31-12-13 10 52 38 pm

A blessing with God’s people who loves me, accepted me, worked with me, labored with me and walked with me. Listening to my rants, rejoicing with me, weep with me and Encouraged me when I needed the extra boost. Blessed beyond measures 🙂

Then a very dear friend who will always remember to come and find me when she is in SG.

We had a such great holiday and we want to go back (anywhere) again.

When I had Z, i was really really (x100) worried for my career my business. I was really wondering how will this work out for us. We had no helper. Both sides did not remember how to care for a baby. I prayed … really hard. When we got ourselves a nanny, we had a small issue with the nanny. Then we hunted for another one without relying any recommendations. Just purely moving with faith and trusting God. Thank God we did find one. Not perfect. 8 months had passed, the nanny dote on Z and that’s more than enough for me. It had been quite amazing. Z’s existence opened new doors for me in my work. Something which I didn’t see it coming. I work harder than before because at the same time I had less time for my work. Motherhood hasn’t been easy. The learning curve continues to be steep. There were times I simply didn’t care, i simply just lie down beside him and slept with the little one. (of course he wasn’t pleased. He discovered that to make me wake up is to sit on my face). Nevertheless he brought much joy in our lives. Thank God for him. 

Back to my work – finally finally after so many years, I am doing something that I had been dreaming for so many years and it had finally come to pass. To give back to the society  by equipping and empowering people. I used my IT and “business” skills (there were times I felt what I had in my brain was really mediocre but Mr Lim said it wasn’t and it is God who have granted the talents for me.)  Many years i dreamt of helping the youth ministry, the youth at risks or the teenage mothers. Back in 2002, my idea of helping was to earn big $, employed them and teach them a skill. The idea was there but it wasn’t easy to fulfill. Fast forward many years, setting up The Shop City and even before the business made any income, we decided maybe we could see how we can reach out. We were aware of government grant that were available for us to tap on. Hence we researched and wrote a proposal. But we didn’t submit as we perhaps we should try out and see what’s the result and that will make our our proposal more sound and practical. My biz partner wrote to a few NGOs and surprise surprise not many were keen to work with us or felt that our project was not suitable for their clients. But God always have another plan for us. One of the NGO decided to meet up with us and find out more. After 3 months of meeting and planning (more proposals written), they accepted our proposal and let us do a pilot program with their clients. More planning took place (I started to think at times “why-on-earth-am-i-doing-this-when-my-son-my-husband-my-bed-gb-friends-deserves-myATTENTION-and-time?”) and fast forward 9 months, the pilot program kicked off in October 2013. We’ve shortlisted 2 clients who were ex-offenders to join this program. I am proud to say coming Jan 2014, they will be “graduating” and will be opening their very own online shop to sell their handmade items on a website after 3 months.

Was it a success? I don’t know (yet). But i know after getting to know these 2 clients and walking with them through for the past 10 weeks, I know i am doing something meaningful. To witness the growth in them was encouraging and kept me going on. Not to mention how God provided for these 2 clients without my ($) help. Praise God.

I’ll trust the Lord will continue to guide me as I map out the future of my businesses. So .. stay tune 😉

There you go – the blessings in my life 🙂 *smile*

Struggle #1 – Being a Godly Wife

I think we’ve overworked.

My husband involved in 3 ministries and also helping my mom and my brother every week.

I on the other hand have 1 youth ministry, 2 businesses and 1 pre-toddler to handle.

We  hardly had much personal time for ourselves. I don’t want to turn it to a complaining session but I am just wondering why are the both of us so busy. Looking at our other friends, they seem more normal. Weekends are reserved for a time together doing family bonding. Both of us? Often have to take turn to take care of Z so that one of us can serve the ministry.

I don’t feel normal at times. Yet I don’t denied that when we get into the mode of serving, we enjoyed every moment. However exhaustion would set in from time to time as we still have our day jobs to handle (countless deadlines).

I secretly hate technology at times. How convenient for  people to locate you via mobile phone and with all the smart phone, you are contactable all the times unless the battery decided to go flat.

I did googling about being a godly wife. Some said that the home ministry is the priority and some said you can serve alongside with your husband who is also in the ministry. I am confused.

When confusion set in, I looked at Proverbs 31 woman – the woman described inside is amazing. She is a

  1. Wife
  2. Mother
  3. Business Woman
  4. Serve in the ministry

Now now… who says woman can only serve in home ministry devotion to just husband, children and house.

I guessed is all about priority, time management and learning to say NO.

Priority – what comes first in my life?
God > My Family > My Work > (fill in the blank)
Very good. I know that already (in my heart) but when comes to tasks or things that required my attention, all priorities are jumbling up which result getting no/little things are checked off from my to-do list.

Time Management
If i rate myself out of 10, i am going to fail and i am too embarrassed to even mention it here. I am the last minute queen of all queens. Don’t ask me why. (distractions…)

Learning to say NO (and live with my decision)
One of the main challenge in my life now. Many times I don’t know how to say No. If i say No, i am going to feel guilty and terrible that as if I owe the person a life time of debt. Another aspect probably being afraid to be labelled as “No Heart (in chinese) to do a certain task. In another words – fear of judgement. Hence because of this, I landed myself into a lot of unnecessary stress which affect the people around me.

HANG IN THERE PY! This phase will pass 🙂